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writers_muses | 76.6. Irony
19/2/09 16:59![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
itwontstopme76.6. Irony
[Follows THIS]
Jason sat staring out the waiting room window with his elbows resting on the sill. He chewed on the end of his straw that was in the can of soda sitting between his elbows and stared blankly out into the car park below. It was ironic, really. Over two years ago he was a patient in this very hospital. It was ironic, really. He was sitting here waiting for news that his best friend was going to be okay but said friend hadn’t even had the courtesy to do the same for him when he broke his neck and was left crippled. Instead, said friend was off bedding Jason’s girlfriend. It was the past, sure, and he had come to forgive both Tim and Lyla, but he just couldn’t seem to forget it. Being here in the hospital he had spent so many months in himself was just bringing it all back again.
He scrunched his nose up and took a small sip of the soda through the compressed straw. It had been such a shock to hear the news that Tim was rushed to hospital that he hadn’t really stopped to consider much in his hurry to get here. Now that Tim had been whisked away behind the scenes for tests and treatment, it was a waiting game and the wait is what set Jason’s brain into motion all over again. The clinical and sterile smell of the hospital alone was unsettling. He had spent weeks and weeks lying on his back in traction and braces following his accident. Just lying there staring at the blank walls or ceiling. He had needed his best friend. When he realised the betrayal, it cut so deep and harshly inside him that the hurt bordered on hate. Jason had hated himself for feeling like that, but it had all been too much. How was he really supposed to cope with losing the use of his legs, losing his career, losing his girlfriend, and losing his best friend all in one blunt blow? The answer was that he couldn’t and he protected himself the best way he knew how.
With anger.
Anger at anyone and anything; even anger that seemed to have no foundation. He yelled at his family and friends for seemingly stupid little things but it was fuelled by so much deeper, underlying hurt. But he turned it into sheer determination, which unfortunately also led to sheer delusion for over a year following the accident. It was all gone now, however, and had led to this very moment… to Tim lying ill in a hospital bed and Jason not even sure how he was supposed to feel about that. He was worried and scared above all else, but having it battle with all the underlying emotions being dragged up from the past was making it hard to think straight.
He closed his eyes and rested his head down on his elbow with a heavy sigh. The wait was the worst but he would stick it out until he knew Tim was okay. And then after that he knew it was time for him and Tim to talk. Really talk. They hadn’t done that since the shit hit the fan. The resolution was always just assumed after Tim went to Mexico with him. It was time to talk it out and clear the air because Jason knew if they didn’t do that, he was never going to be really able to trust his friend again.
Tim Riggins [![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
texas33forever] & Sam Jameson [supermarketsam] referenced with permission
Word Count | 583
[Follows THIS]
Jason sat staring out the waiting room window with his elbows resting on the sill. He chewed on the end of his straw that was in the can of soda sitting between his elbows and stared blankly out into the car park below. It was ironic, really. Over two years ago he was a patient in this very hospital. It was ironic, really. He was sitting here waiting for news that his best friend was going to be okay but said friend hadn’t even had the courtesy to do the same for him when he broke his neck and was left crippled. Instead, said friend was off bedding Jason’s girlfriend. It was the past, sure, and he had come to forgive both Tim and Lyla, but he just couldn’t seem to forget it. Being here in the hospital he had spent so many months in himself was just bringing it all back again.
He scrunched his nose up and took a small sip of the soda through the compressed straw. It had been such a shock to hear the news that Tim was rushed to hospital that he hadn’t really stopped to consider much in his hurry to get here. Now that Tim had been whisked away behind the scenes for tests and treatment, it was a waiting game and the wait is what set Jason’s brain into motion all over again. The clinical and sterile smell of the hospital alone was unsettling. He had spent weeks and weeks lying on his back in traction and braces following his accident. Just lying there staring at the blank walls or ceiling. He had needed his best friend. When he realised the betrayal, it cut so deep and harshly inside him that the hurt bordered on hate. Jason had hated himself for feeling like that, but it had all been too much. How was he really supposed to cope with losing the use of his legs, losing his career, losing his girlfriend, and losing his best friend all in one blunt blow? The answer was that he couldn’t and he protected himself the best way he knew how.
With anger.
Anger at anyone and anything; even anger that seemed to have no foundation. He yelled at his family and friends for seemingly stupid little things but it was fuelled by so much deeper, underlying hurt. But he turned it into sheer determination, which unfortunately also led to sheer delusion for over a year following the accident. It was all gone now, however, and had led to this very moment… to Tim lying ill in a hospital bed and Jason not even sure how he was supposed to feel about that. He was worried and scared above all else, but having it battle with all the underlying emotions being dragged up from the past was making it hard to think straight.
He closed his eyes and rested his head down on his elbow with a heavy sigh. The wait was the worst but he would stick it out until he knew Tim was okay. And then after that he knew it was time for him and Tim to talk. Really talk. They hadn’t done that since the shit hit the fan. The resolution was always just assumed after Tim went to Mexico with him. It was time to talk it out and clear the air because Jason knew if they didn’t do that, he was never going to be really able to trust his friend again.
Tim Riggins [
texas33forever] & Sam Jameson [supermarketsam] referenced with permissionWord Count | 583
